Wednesday

TOP 10 Reasons Why Dog Owners Pickup After Their Dogs but Horse Owners Do Not

A Facebook friend posted a question which was posed by her child who wanted to know why "dog owners have to pickup after their dogs but horse owners don't have to pickup after their horses." It got me thinking, which, in my case, can be a dangerous exercise. Regardless, following is how I spent my precious morning while riding my elliptical bike.
TOP 10 Reasons Why Dog Owners Pickup After Their Dogs but Horse Owners Do Not


TOP 10 Reasons Why Dog Owners Pickup After Their Dogs but Horse Owners Do Not

10. While horse piles are conspicuous and easily avoidable, canine excrement is imbued with stealth properties, including a special magnetic attraction to the soles of shoes and bare feet.

9. Doggies are forever running ahead of their owners, making their business as plain as day. Horse owners, however, riding atop, are facing the wrong direction and are invariably unaware of the performance orchestrated behind them.

8. Volumes have been written on the beneficial uses of Horse Manure. They boast of a rich heritage of compost, of rose and vegetable gardens - a nuanced milieu of the "organic," elevating its stature to celestial heights. However, when it comes to dog poo, it's nothing but shite.

7. Should you inadvertently get in the way of your dog doing its business, neither its poo or pee will do harm. Misstep with your horse and you'd wish you brought a raincoat and umbrella.

6. It's nothing to toss a couple doggie-bags in one's pocket for late afternoon stroll with one's pooch, but neither teenager or grannie alike have an appetite for trudging around the block with a shovel and bucket in tow, let alone a stout rucksack, and in many cases a forklift.

5. Dog owners seen picking up after their dogs are admired and elevated to sainthood. Who picks up horse sh*t? The dregs of society.

4. While horse manure cigarettes are common and have been around for centuries, not only can dog poop cause blindness, I don't see a day anytime soon where Great Dane poop sticks are mainstream. Talk about the detriments of secondhand smoke...

3. Since dog's leave their packages on sidewalks, and horses drop on roads, the leisurely stroller or focused runner are not served by the distraction of having to dart about, but it does afford the motorcyclist a favorable whack at bettering their split-second reaction times, especially navigating corners.

2. When's the last time you've seen either your local grocery store or park offer Horsie Bags?

1. And the Number One reason why dog owners pickup after the dogs but horse owners do not:  

Simply drive along any county road and you'll see yard signs declaring "Horse Manure For Sale!" I don't recall anyone ever trying to sell me Dog Poo, that is until the launch of Obamacare.


Mark
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