5 Toughest Questions for a Married Man

With Valentine's Day swiftly approaching, I thought it apropos to offer a few insights into the 5 Toughest Questions a Married Man will ever hear from their wife or significant other. The odds of at least one of these questions being posed when you're out for that romantic Valentine's dinner is almost a certainty. The is especially true if you've been busy and not paying as much attention to her as usual. 

Nothing new here folks - but it still bears repeating the
5 Toughest Questions for a Married Man

With my brief introduction out of the way, here now are those 5 Toughest Questions, along with the keen "insight" I've copied down some two dozen years ago:

1.  What are you thinking about?
2.  Do you love me?
3.  Do I look fat?
4.  Do you think she is prettier than me?
5.  What would you do if I died?

What makes these questions so difficult is that every one is guaranteed to explode into a major argument if the man answers incorrectly (i.e.;  tells the truth). Therefore, as a public service, each question is analyzed below, along with possible responses.

Question # 1:  What are you thinking about?
 The proper answer to this, of course, is: "I'm sorry if  I've been pensive, dear.  I was just reflecting on what a warm, wonderful, thoughtful, caring, intelligent woman you are, and how lucky I am to have met you."

Your response obviously bears no resemblance to a true answer, which most likely is one of the  following:

•  Baseball.
•  Football.
•  How fat you are.
•  How much prettier she is than you.
•  How I would spend the insurance money if you died.

 Perhaps the best response to this question was offered by Al Bundy, who once told Peg, "If I wanted you to know what I was thinking, I would be talking to you!"


Question # 2:  Do you love me?
 The proper response is: "YES!" or, if you feel a more detailed answer is in order, "Yes, dear."

 Inappropriate responses include:

• Oh Yeah.
• Would it make you feel better if I said yes?
• That depends on what you mean by love.
• Does it matter?
• Who, me?

Question # 3:  Do I look fat?
The correct answer is an emphatic: "Of course not!"

Among the incorrect answers are:

• Compared to what?
• I wouldn't call you fat, but you're not exactly thin.
• A little extra weight looks good on you.
• Could you repeat the question?  I was just thinking about how I would spend the insurance money if you died.

Question # 4:  Do you think she's prettier than me?
Once again, the proper response is an emphatic: "Of course not!"

Incorrect responses include:

• Yes, but you have a better personality
• Not prettier, but definitely thinner
• Not as pretty as you when you were her age
• Define pretty
• Could you repeat the question?  I was just thinking about how I would spend the insurance money if you died.

Question # 5:  What would you do if I died?
A definite no-win question (the real answer, of course, is "Buy a Corvette"). No matter how you answer this, be prepared for at least an hour of follow-up questions, usually along the these lines:

 WOMAN:  Would you get married again?
 MAN: Definitely not!
 WOMAN:  Why not - don't you like being married?
 MAN:  Of course I do.
 WOMAN:  Then why wouldn't you remarry?
 MAN: Okay, I'd get married again.
 WOMAN:  You would? (with a hurtful look on her face)
 MAN: Yes, I would.
 WOMAN:  Would you sleep with her in our bed?
 MAN: Where else would we sleep?
 WOMAN:  Would you put away my pictures, and replace them with pictures of her?
 MAN: That would seem like the proper thing to do.
 WOMAN:  And would you let her use my golf clubs?
 MAN: She can't use them; she's left-handed

Mark

©Googtoon - Life • Popular Culture • Politics • Entertainment • Public Figures

Mark Jordan Photography

Orange County Family Portrait

Orange County Headshots

The Bourne Legacy - Photos

While we're anxiously waiting for the release of The Bourne Legacy, I've posted a few images and The Bourne Legacy official trailer for your convenience.

New poster with enticing tagline: "There was never just one." 

Besides the obvious,  i.e. Bourne Legacy is based on Robert Ludlum's novels, not much is known about the story except that it is centered on a new CIA operative in the universe.

The Bourne Legacy - The New Uber-spy supplanting Jason Bourne 

The Bourne Legacy is scheduled to be released August 3 with Jeremy Renner (recently seen alongside Tom Cruise in Mission Impossible 4 - Ghost Protocol) being asked to undertake the seemingly impossible task of superseding Matt Damon of the highly successful Bourne franchise.

The Bourne Legacy - There Was Never Just One 

Renner, however, is taking on an altogether different role as yet another lethal agent inducted into the covert realm we were first introduced in Bourne Identity. Finally, we are just now getting our first glimpse at Renner as the new uber-spy.

The Bourne Legacy - Jeremy Renner taking aim at an Airplane that was in the original trailer. 
It's been replaced by an Unmanned Aerial Vehicle (UAV). Though the trailer's still air with the
airplane, you won't see it in the actual movie.

Mark Jordan Photography is excited to hear my favorite characters/actors are returning, Joan Allen, Albert Finney, Scott Glenn and David Strathairn, though I am already lamenting the loss of Julia Stiles. The film's cast includes the addition of one of my favorite actors, Edward Norton. Other newcomers to the franchise are Oscar Isaac, Rachel Weisz and Midnight in Paris's Corey Stoll.

The Bourne Legacy - Favorite Characters Return 

Stay tuned for movie stills as they become available.

Mark

©Photosical - the photographic and personal observations of Orange County Photographer, Mark Jordan Photography

Mark Jordan Photography
Orange County Family Portrait
Orange County Beach Portrait
Orange County Senior Portrait
Orange County Children Portraits
Orange County Headshot
Belly Art Photography
Wordle™ Puzzles

Orange County Photographer, Mark Jordan Photography, an Rancho Santa Margarita Photographer, specializes in crafting stunning contemporary, traditional, classic, and storytelling family portraits (high school seniors, children portraits, babies, maternity, pregnancy), headshots and pets. Mark Jordan, a Photography Hall of Fame photographer (with a Rancho Santa Margarita portrait studio), and provides portrait photography throughout Orange County and Southern California. Mark Jordan's Orange County portrait studio also serves San Diego County and Inland Empire. Studio Photography Services are also provided in Riverside County and Los Angeles County. Local Cites where Mark Jordan photography studio services are offered are as an Aliso Viejo Photographer, Anaheim Photographer, Costa Mesa Photographer, Coto de Caza Photographer, Dana Point Photographer, Dove Canyon Photographer, Huntington Beach Photographer, Irvine Photographer, Ladera Ranch Photographer, Laguna Beach Photographer, Laguna Hills Photographer, Laguna Niguel Photographer, Lake Forest Photographer, Mission Viejo Photographer, Newport Beach Photographer, Northwood Photographer, Orange Photographer, Orange Park Acres Photographer, San Clemente Photographer, San Juan Capistrano Photographer, Santa Ana Photographer, Tustin Photographer, Villa Park Photographer, Westminster Photographer, Yorba Linda Photographer, Corona del Mar Photographer, Riverside Photographer, Temecula Photographer, Chino Hills Photographer, Loma Linda Photographer, Rancho Bernardo Photographer, Carlsbad Photographer, Coronado Photographer, Del Mar Photographer, Escondido Photographer, San Diego Photographer, San Marcos Photographer, Solana Beach Photographer, Carmel Mountain Ranch Photographer, Rancho San Diego Photographer, Rancho Santa Fe Photographer, and San Diego Country Estates Photographer, Turtle Rock Photographer, Shady Canyon Photographer. Portrait Photographers everywhere (photographers in O.C. as well) are welcome to contact our portrait studio for mentoring/guidance.

Men Are Bluetooth - Women Are Wi-Fi

One placard says it all...

Men Are l\Like Bluetooth...yet one more way to express the differences between Men and Woman. 

Men are like Bluetooth:
He is connected to you when you are nearby, but searches for other devices when you are away.

Women are like Wi-Fi:
She sees all available devices but connects to the strongest one.

Hope you don't mind the whimsy of an Orange County portrait photographer. It's not the original idea of Mark Jordan Photography, mind you, but rather a kind of variation on a theme. I was compelled to do my part to make the original more appealing - just for the fun of it...

ADDENDUM: the answer is YES, you have my permission to copy my design and forward to whomever you like. It would kind to cite where you received it, or click LIKE below or at Mark Jordan Photography.

Mark

©Googtoon - Life • Popular Culture • Politics • Entertainment • Public Figures

Mark Jordan Photography

Orange County Family Portraits

Orange County Headshots

11 Key Tips to Increase Your Google Ranking

After reading an informative article in Mashable Business I thought it would be very useful for so many of my readers. Rather than simply posting a link to it and creating the opportunity for you to either forget or misplace it, I thought you would be better served were I to take the time and post the best parts here for you. Aren't I a nice guy...? 

Actually, I am practicing what I preach (see point #1). It's not only Content but it will be beneficial for some time to come.


I am making the assumption here that the vital importance of your Google rank in relation to the success of your business is well understood. As any "savvy entrepreneur" should know, the degree to which an online business is implementing sound SEO (Search Engine Optimization) practices will largely determine the growth and efficacy of their business. If you're struggling with your SEO, more than likely your business is struggle as well. 


For my photography studio in Rancho Santa Margarita, Mark Jordan Photography, SEO has made all the difference in the world. Not only are my family portraits thriving (Orange County Family Portrait), my Orange County Headshot business (where I create business portraits and headshots for the arts), is off the charts busy (especially in Irvine for some reason).  


Since then, I've experimented, opening a high school senior portrait division (Orange County Senior Portrait), a separate site just for children's portraits (Orange County Children Portraits), as well as my most recent family beach portrait website (Orange County Beach Portraits). All of which would be nonexistent were it not for the magic of SEO.


Portrait Photographers from all over the county now contact me and want to know what my secret is for developing a successful photography business and portrait studio. Which brings me to one of reasons for my post. I can now simply point these photographers to my blog. Thank you Mashable Business for posting this article.    


The key is to boost your Google search rankings. Sounds simple enough, right? Maybe. However, I'll let you determine this for yourself. 


So then, with no further ado (I've always wanted to say this), here are several powerful Tips to Increase Your Google Ranking.


1. CONTENT - Make It Timeless

"You’ll want your content to take the top slots for your name and various keywords and phrases, so you’ll want to have high-quality, authoritative content. The best way to make sure your content is seen this way to is create content that is forever useful, not trendy and disposable. Create content that people will be reading 10 years from now, and you’ll be getting linkbacks for a decade. Colin Wright, Exile Lifestyle




2. PROFILES - Review Your Online Presence

Take a few minutes to login to each of your company’s online profiles. Is the biography up to date? More importantly, is your website’s URL listed somewhere? The incoming links from these profiles may not weigh too much in Google’s mysterious algorithm, but you’ll be surprised what it can do if you have more than a handful of accounts online. Logan Lenz, Endagon






3.EXPERTS - Seek Professional Help

I suggest hiring a search engine optimization company or freelance specialist to develop an effective strategy to improve your rankings. The Google Panda updates has made the SEO space even more challenging to produce results, so I suggest outsourcing this task to the professionals. Look for individuals or companies with proven track records, and monitor their bi-weekly reports closely. Anthony Saladino, Kitchen Cabinet Kings




4. POSTING - Become a Guest Poster 

Start guest posting on tons of relevant blogs. Blogs love fresh content, and for you it’s a great way to build links, which will boost your rankings on Google. Ben Lang, MySchoolHelp














5. LINKS - Grow Backlings

Yes, creating good content is very important to make your business rank higher in Google. But links are even more important. Google loves links, especially those from other relevant, authority websites. Join any and all industry associations, guest blog with a link back to your website, and submit your site to any relevant directories to grow your backlink profile and your searches. Warren Jolly, Affiliate Media Inc








6. VIDEO - Give Your Business Personality

Video is such a huge thing now for business owners. Not only does it give your company personality, but it can also be spread across networks while linking back to your site. Create great videos filled with information people can share and then repeat. Now videos can be distributed across multiple platforms from one single platform, causing Google to love you. Ashley Bodi, Business Beware






7. EDU SECRET - Colleges Link To You 

The biggest SEO secret is that when .edu sites link to your website it gives you a higher Google ranking. Contact college and universities and find a reason for them to link to your site by running a special internship opportunity, for example. Nick Friedman, College Hunks Hauling Junk










8. UPDATES - Keep Your Site Fresh  

The more often you update your site, the more important Google thinks it is. If you can publish content to your blog every day, Google will start to recognize you as a great source of information for whatever your keywords are. With every blog post, you have another chance at ranking for new search terms, so each article increases the odds of your site being found. Matt Wilson, Under30CEO.com.








9. CAN FLASH - It's Cool But Ranks Poorly

Many small businesses, especially restaurants and bars, use Flash for their sites because it’s easy to launch, looks good and is fairly cheap. While the sites might look decent, they rank really poorly in Google (without doing some tricks). Change your Flash-based site to WordPress or another platform, and you’ll rocket up the search engine rankings. Nathan Lustig, Entrustet




10. LOCAL SEARCH - Claim Your Local Listings

Are you a local business? Have you claimed your listing on Google, Yahoo! and Bing? If not, stop reading this article now and go claim your business listings immediately! I’ve seen a huge jump in traffic for businesses by simply claiming and filling out all the fields on these local profiles. The future of search is personalized local results, and these valuable profiles are often overlooked. Andrew Saladino, Just Bath Vanities


11. KEYWORDS - Think Like Your Client

Think about what your ideal clients and customers might be typing into Google, and then find out if your hunch is right by looking keywords up in Google’s free Keyword Tool. Keep in mind that 25% of keywords have never been typed in before, but you’ll want to aim for popular keywords with low competition if you can. Then write content around these keywords and learn to optimize. Nathalie Lussier, Nathalie Lussier Media


Keyword Analysis Is Key Two effective ways of increasing your SEO rank are tagging articles and keyword analysis. You want to make sure your headlines are descriptive. You should also choose keywords that people are going to look for — so imagine yourself as a searcher. Lauren Perkins, Lauren Perkins






Use Words People Use 
The biggest mistake people make in trying to rank high in Google is having no clue what people are actually typing into search engines to find you. An easy way to find this out is to go to the Google homepage and slowly start typing in your phrases. You’ll notice Google suggested searches come up. Use those exact phrases in your titles. That’s what people want, so give it to them. Trevor Mauch, Automize, LLC

Just in case your wondering, PageRank is not the same as your Google ranking. Where as your Google ranking is about your business position in Google's search results, which is determined based on a number of factors designed to provide end-users with helpful, accurate search results, PageRank is a link analysis algorithm (named after Larry Page) and used by the Google Internet search engine. PageRank assigns a numerical weighting to each element of a hyperlinked set of documents, such as the World Wide Web, with the purpose of "measuring" its relative importance within the set." OK, got that?


With that said, you've now got the information necessary to go out and raise your ranking in Google. Were I to do it all over, again, I think I would have taken point #3 to heart, and invested in a knowledgable professional, sooner. 


Mark

©Photosical - the photographic and personal observations of Orange County Photographer, Mark Jordan

Mark Jordan Photography

Orange County Family Portrait

Orange County Beach Portrait

Orange County Senior Portrait

Orange County Children Portraits

Orange County Headshot

Belly Art Photography

Wordle™ Puzzles

Orange County Photographer, Mark Jordan Photography, an Rancho Santa Margarita Photographer, specializes in crafting stunning contemporary, traditional, classic, and storytelling family portraits (high school seniors, children portraits, babies, maternity, pregnancy), headshots and pets. Mark Jordan, a Photography Hall of Fame photographer (with a Rancho Santa Margarita portrait studio), and provides portrait photography throughout Orange County and Southern California. Mark Jordan's Orange County portrait studio also serves San Diego County and Inland Empire. Studio Photography Services are also provided in Riverside County and Los Angeles County. Local Cites where Mark Jordan photography studio services are offered are as an Aliso Viejo Photographer, Anaheim Photographer, Brea Photographer, Costa Mesa Photographer, Coto de Caza Photographer, Cypress Photographer, Dana Point Photographer, Dove Canyon Photographer, Fountain Valley Photographer, Huntington Beach Photographer, Irvine Photographer, Ladera Ranch Photographer, Laguna Beach Photographer, Laguna Hills Photographer, Laguna Niguel Photographer, Laguna Woods Photographer, Lake Forest Photographer, Mission Viejo Photographer, Newport Beach Photographer, Northwood Photographer, Orange Photographer, Orange Park Acres Photographer, San Clemente Photographer, San Juan Capistrano Photographer, Santa Ana Photographer, Tustin Photographer, Villa Park Photographer, Westminster Photographer, Yorba Linda Photographer, Corona del Mar Photographer, Murrieta Photographer, Murrieta Hot Springs Photographer, Quail Valley Photographer, Riverside Photographer, Temecula Photographer, Winchester Photographer, Chino Hills Photographer, Fontana Photographer, Grand Terrace Photographer, Loma Linda Photographer, Montclair Photographer, Rancho Bernardo Photographer, Carlsbad Photographer, Coronado Photographer, Del Mar Photographer, Escondido Photographer, La Mesa Photographer, Oceanside Photographer, San Diego Photographer, San Marcos Photographer, Solana Beach Photographer, Vista Photographer, Carmel Mountain Ranch Photographer, Rancho San Diego Photographer, Rancho Santa Fe Photographer, and San Diego Country Estates Photographer, Turtle Rock Photographer, Shady Canyon Photographer. Portrait Photographers everywhere (photographers in O.C. as well) are welcome to contact our portrait studio for mentoring/guidance.

Courageous - Movie Review Lite

Courageous - Fatherhood on Steroids

While attending a Saddleback Church men's retreat a few months back, one of the optional evening activities was to catch a pre-release viewing of the soon to be released film, Courageous. Being labeled as the movie addict in my social circles (I make time to watch around a dozen a week), I do my best to catch a good portion of new releases, and of any genre. However, when I comes to "Christian themed" movies, if I go, I do so begrudgingly. Courageous was no exception.

BIG SURPRISE!

Courageous, at its essence, is about fatherhood. The film centers around the lives of five men, four of which are policemen. The dads are the typical, garden-variety type, with varying degrees of competency at managing their respective roles as father, husband, and Christian. Regardless, all have one trait in common: none are particularly ignited by their faith.

What propels the story is a tragedy in the life of Adam Mitchell, which forces him to ask profound questions regarding his relationships - primarily with his God and son. This leads to a discovery that not only changes Adam's life, but just about every man I spoke with after our evening's preview. 

Mind you, our version of Courageous did not include the music sound track. The film was still in production phase. I can only imagine how more poignant Courageous will show in its final edit. The tears I saw squeaking down the cheeks of men will most surely turn to buckets... 

Before you more stoic men get overly anxious about stirring up emotion, let me assure you the film is neither corny or overt. You'll only get out of it what you are willing to allow exposure to whatever areas in your life might need illumination. Being somewhat an emotional Orange County photographer, I was an open book... 

Though I recommend Courageous for every man, it is especially relevant to those who have children and desire to be the best dad possible. 

I've attached one of the movie trailers below to give you a glimpse. However, I've noticed that none of the trailers contain the one element I loved about Courageous: humor. This film is funny - I'm talking lough-out-load funny! Why they've chosen to conceal one of the strongest reasons to see Courageous is a mystery to me. Sure, it a serious film with a life-altering message. Regardless, I guarantee you're going to enjoy the journey along the way. 

All things considered, Orange County Photographer, Mark Jordan, gives Courageous a resounding 5 Lens Review:

Mark

©Googtoon - Life • Popular Culture • Politics • Entertainment • Public Figures

Mark Jordan Photography

Orange County Family Portraits

Orange County Headshots

DAILY QUIET TIME

DAILY QUIET TIME has been moved - it's now TWO Posts. 

Here you go:

PART 1: DAILY QUIET TIME - The Intimacy Factor: Part 1 of 2

PART 2: DAILY QUIET TIME - The Intimacy Factor: Part 2 of 2

Mark

©Googtoon - Life • Popular Culture • Politics • Entertainment • Public Figures

Mark Jordan Photography

Orange County Family Portrait

Orange County Headshots